How To Rewire Your Brain for Joy
When I woke up this morning, I wondered what I should write. My first thought was, “Joy is a really big deal.” I didn’t understand this for a long time, actually, joy always seemed right out of my reach. It seemed others were in touch with joy in ways I had yet to experience.
I had moments of happiness, but the deep joy I longed for, seemed impossible. I grew up in a family full of dysfunction. We may have looked joyful on the outside, but in reality, we were really low on joy.
As a believer, I knew joy was possible because the Bible talked about it. I had experienced being with joyful people, but I felt very void of that true abiding joy.
I had an inner desire for joy. I wanted to know, truly know, what the joy of the Lord was; and I wanted to be sustained by the strength of it. I wanted to know what it felt like in my body to be filled with joy. Experiencing what it was like to live from a place of joy rather than just seeking it on occasion – that was my desire!
Do you know the song- I got the joy, joy, joy, down in my heart, that some of us sang as children? Well, I can honestly say that I now have that joy and I am so grateful. This is why I now shout it from the rooftops and I write books about it for children.
I want children (and adults) to know from early on, that they can experience joy. It can give them the capacity for hard things.
Several years ago, I learned about the power of appreciation. When I began engaging this newfound skill, I discovered it was the key to unlocking joy.
The Power of Appreciation
Appreciation is packaged joy, a very powerful gift.
Joy means someone’s glad to be with me. Joy is a relational transaction. So, when I can remember times of appreciation, I can experience true joy. I use appreciation to build joyful capacity in my brain. Now as a coach, I use my joyful capacity to help others find joy and build it.
Appreciation is when I can recall times in my life when I felt joyful, peaceful, accepted, or connected. It’s the place where I train my brain to look for the good things in life. No matter how bleak our lives have been, we all have moments of appreciation.
At first, this exercise was hard. I didn’t think I had any moments to appreciate, but the more I practiced the easier it became.
An appreciation memory can be as simple as the flower growing wild in the garden, or a smile from the cashier at the grocery store. It could be that first sip of morning coffee. Or it might be a big life-changing event or experience such as a wedding, birth, or baptism.
It is not the size of the memory that rewires the brain. It is the intentional focus on how it feels in our body and emotions to be joyful, peaceful, connected, or accepted.
Appreciation is Relational
Appreciation activated my relational mind, and it helped me better connect with God and people. We can literally “come into His presence” when we are in a state of appreciation.
The Bible tells us to enter God’s gates with thanksgiving (Psalms 100:4). Neuroscience has now discovered that by keeping our minds in a state of appreciation, it helps us stay connected to those we love. This includes God.
Collecting Appreciation Memories
I love the way God created our brains! I now collect appreciation memories – some include memories with people or pets, some in nature, and others with God. Some memories bring high-energy joy and some bring low-energy peace. Learning to be intentional in this practice has helped me establish rhythms of joy and peace in my life.
Appreciation memories are meant to be shared. This is a great exercise for families, small groups, or friends to practice together. Sharing our memories turns our hearts and minds towards God and towards each other.
Your memories help my brain and my memories when shared help your brain. When we share our memories, it activates our relational brain and enables us to sense God’s presence and His thoughts. You could say that appreciation is a gateway into God‘s presence, His peace, and His love.
Appreciation is a skill that can be learned and practiced. It is never too late. God created our brains to keep learning and growing. Joy is achievable!
My brand-new children’s book, Switched on for Joy, is my offering. Learning about appreciation and the invisible switch in my brain has helped me find relational JOY!
What is one positive memory you can thank God for today?
Share in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group!
*This was a guest post written by Heather Meades.