Do Differences in Your Team Threaten to Destroy Unity?

Have you ever lost your temper? Gotten upset with fellow team members? Differences in personality, culture, and spiritual gifting can drive us apart. Or, these differences can make us strong and effective as a missionary team.

My husband and I are extreme opposites in many areas.

Sometimes he drives me crazy! Yeah, I know. I make him want to pull his hair out sometimes too. Over time though, we have learned to appreciate one another’s differences. That doesn’t mean it isn’t ever difficult!

We are so different! Sometimes that is hard. We have learned though, that it is important to make space for one another’s gifts and desires to be expressed. That makes our lives, ministry, and marriage much happier.

He is a slow, steady, and thorough processor. I am a fast, rapid decision-maker. Most of the time I am far down the road in my thinking by the time he catches up. From his perspective, I miss important details that matter when I only see the big picture.

It can feel like a real challenge some days to journey together in life and ministry. Yet together, we are a strong team, especially when we can appreciate and honor one another. As we celebrate our differences we move forward with joy.

Though this example is from marriage, it is the same in our teams. After all, if you are married, you are a missionary team first with your spouse, right?

Do They Strengthen Or Divide Your Missionary Team

Though our differences are a challenge, they can become a significant strength if we keep the right attitudes. If not, they will weaken and divide us. Over the next weeks, I will write about key areas where we commonly experience differences in our missionary teams.

I will share some of my personal experiences in these realms and give tips you can apply to your team as well. As a bonus, if you are married, you will find these articles useful for your marriage too.

A spiritual gift is given to each of us so we can help each other. 1 Cor. 12:7 NLT

The Purpose Of the Gifts

I love this verse. It comes just before the list of spiritual gifts in 1 Corinthians 12. The purpose of spiritual gifts is so we can help one another! God made us different for a reason. He gave us our uniqueness so that together we would represent and serve Him well.

Are you tempted to think that different = bad? Or maybe in your mind you know different is good, but your feelings don’t line up. Different can feel really bad indeed! It certainly isn’t comfortable.

3 Areas Of Difference

In working with teams for the past twenty plus years, there are three primary areas I’ve seen teams struggle.

1) Personality and Temperament.

This has to do with who you are. Many different tools can help you understand more about yourself. They can also bring insights into who your fellow team members are. I will mention them in another resource.

• Are you an introvert or an extrovert? A fast or slow processor?
• Do you prefer things to stay the same or do you love change and variety?

These have to do with personality and temperament. They affect our team dynamics in very significant ways.

2) Culture and Worldview.

Some teams are made up of people from different cultures. At times those differences are extreme! Other times the variance is less radical.

On almost any team culture and worldview differences come into play as we work together. Understanding one another’s cultural background is necessary. Then, we can celebrate and benefit from differences. That is so much better than becoming angry and divided.

• Are you from a warm or cold culture?
• How important is community? Individual freedom of choice?
• What do respect and honor look like in your culture?

These ways of thinking about life have a big impact on how we function as a team.

3) Spiritual Gifts and Ministry Passions.

The five-fold ministry gifts are a good starting point when talking about spiritual gifts. Those gifts are; apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor, and teacher. We should consider the other lists of spiritual gifts in light of our team as well. Check out my conversation on the Dare to Multiply podcast with Neil Cole about this. He calls it APEST.

Teachers can clash with evangelists. Why bring all these people to Christ if they never learn the Word of God and get rooted deeply in their faith? So the teachers say.

Pastors often feel apostles are too brash.

Evangelists think pastors waste too much time nurturing the flock when people are dying without the gospel.

Prophets tend to offend almost everyone at some point! Sorry, prophetic friends.

Yet each of these gifts is important to have represented in our teams. We need to make space for them to function and be welcomed if we want a strong team. Watch for more on this in future articles.

Start With Prayer And Appreciation

Let me return to my first question. Do you ever struggle with anger toward those on your team who are different from you?

Some people get angry and show it. Others simmer internally. Almost all of us find it a challenge to work with those who are not the same as we are.

It helps to remember that God, who knows what is best for His Kingdom’s advance, designed us this way. He made us different so we could help each other build His Church and take His purposes forward. We need each other.

Take a moment to thank God for the differences in your team or marriage. Pray a prayer and thank God specifically for the person you struggle most with.

Thank God for that perspective or personality trait that is so different from yours. Then if you want to go the extra mile, this week, let them know you are grateful for who they are.

Which of these three areas do you find most challenging in your team? Differences in personality, culture, or ministry passion?

Let me know in the comments or in the survey on the Missionary Life Facebook page. I’d love to hear from you!