A New Year’s Exercise for Those God Calls Friends

How does God see us? Often, as highly motivated missionaries, we view ourselves in terms of our work/ministry. Success or failure in that area is a big deal.

He Calls Us Friends

Jesus said to his disciples, “I no longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15 NIV.

God cares for us as friends, not just what we can do or produce. To grow in friendship with God, we must make time to be with Him, not talking about work, but opening my life and heart to Him.

We have all gone through times of distress in the last year.

Things have not happened the way we expected. There was loss, sickness, or loneliness. Many have longed for 2020 to be over so they could put it all behind them.

Maybe last year was a year where you look back and think; what have I accomplished, or done for God? Has it been a waste of a year?

The sorrow of this past year should not be wasted or buried.

We can take the pressing and squeezing of us as “grapes” and let it produce wine. How can we do that?

It is a matter of perspective, processing, and growth.

Perspective

In Hebrews 12, the writer instructs us to look at hardship as discipline. We shouldn’t look at all that has happened as God with a big stick using it to beat us. Instead, we can see it more as an opportunity to be trained.

I have a son who is into body-building. He has to submit himself to discipline/training and coaching even when his muscles are aching.

Your perspective of hardship and discipline will either lead you into doubting God’s goodness or growing in wisdom and godliness.

“Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children… God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.”

Hebrews 12:7,11-13 NIV

First, recognize that even painful things have a purpose as we grow from them. God is still our loving Father, and through it all he is training us, strengthening us to overcome.

Process

How can we process? How can we be trained by what we have gone through? Processing takes reflection, thinking, and facing what has happened.

Here is a simple exercise that could help you process and unpack the last year.

You will need; 1-2 hours time, paper, and some different color pens. A Bible, your calendar, notebooks, or photos from the last year to jog your memory could be helpful too.

First, you are going to reflect, and remind yourself what actually happened this year. Unpack the events, relationships, thoughts, and feelings of the last year.

Two options of how to do this.

• Make a circle cut into 12 segments- one for each month. Or…
• Make a little chart with the month of the year on the horizontal axis.

Put the positive things above the line, and negative things below. You can show the degree/severity of the event depending on how high or low you place it

Use a different color for each.

Write in the points for each month:

• good highlights that happened.

• all the painful/ negative things.

• the names of any significant people/relational things that happened in that month.

Pick another color for dominating thoughts you were having during the year. Write them down in that month. What were the questions that came to you during those times? Write them down.

Use a couple of different colors to depict different feelings you were having. Be as honest as you can remember. Try and cover the feelings of anger, fear, guilt/shame, sadness. If possible, write what was triggering those feelings in that color.

Growth

What are new things you learned from your experiences, “life lessons,” or new skills?

What has God been saying to you? As you look back on your year, and wait on God ask God for his perspective of your year. What does He want you to see?

What is one way you changed this year? Emotionally, physically, spiritually?

Talk to him about the questions you have had. Ask him for revelation and understanding.

Pray about the feelings you had. Ask him to forgive, comfort, or strengthen you.

Talk to God about the major relationships from this year. Give thanks, forgive, or make plans about how to restore, or work on, any important relationships that are not healthy or you have been absent in.

Try to write down three things you learned from this year that you will take forward with you into the future. Maybe make some new mottos. These are short sayings you can write and stick on your wall to remind yourself of. Allow yourself to be “trained” by what you have gone through.

Lastly, looking forward. Are there any “straight paths” you can make for yourself? Habits you can start? Or situations you can choose to engage or avoid?

As you look forward, what relationships do you need to invest in? Connections you want to strengthen? How will you do that?

I pray this exercise will strengthen you for all that is coming ahead in these turbulent times.

Any new mottos for the year? Share in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group.

The above blog was written by guest author. R.M.