How Do I Trust God in the Midst of My Visa Uncertainty?
After more than twenty years, he was finally granted a visa. He would return to the place of his original missionary calling. Visa uncertainty threatened to steal his peace, however, even in the midst of this exciting moment.
His passport finally had the visa stamp. But would he be turned away at the airport, as he was so many years before?
This morning I prayed for my friend who is facing this. I wonder what will happen.
Visa Uncertainties – A Common Reality
Speaking to a group of new missionaries, I talked about visa uncertainty.
“If you haven’t yet had a visa-related problem, you most likely will,” I said. “If you manage to live as a missionary without any visa challenges, you are quite an exception.”
God is with us in visa-related storms. He longs to deeply meet us in these most turbulent of seasons.
Uncovering Deep Needs
Visa challenges can uncover deep needs in our inner lives. We come face to face with issues related to what is called basic trust.
“Is God good? Will He be there to help us? Is life safe?” we ask.
“Can I feel secure on the mission field when my visa is so unpredictable?”
Though it’s not easy, surrendering to God’s process in our lives brings an opportunity for emotional growth. We can allow God to use our visa storms to heal rather than harm us. We can emerge stronger and more secure in His love.
“The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace.” Ps 29:11- NIV
Cracks In Basic Trust
Every visa-related crisis is different, as are the individuals involved. One of the root issues that may surface relates to our trust. If there are cracks in the foundation of trust from childhood, they will affect us.
I Knew They Loved Me…But
As a missionary kid, I always knew my parents loved me. In that way, I was fortunate.
In the early months of my life, however, there was a war in the country where my parents served. My mother, elder brother and I left Africa and returned to the United States. I was a year old and my brother was four.
My father stayed behind to serve in relief efforts. For many months, my courageous mom coped with a husband far away and in danger. She did her best to love and care for her two little ones at home. We were physically safe, but the love and presence of a father were missing in those early months of my life.
Crisis Times Reveal Emotional Deficits
Later, my husband and I worked as missionaries too. As is common, we struggled with visa uncertainty. Other challenges on the mission field combined with those difficulties as well.
A fear of abandonment began to rise inside of me. I wasn’t sure life would be okay.
Would God leave me alone and struggling?
I needed help to recognize that these fears were caused by root issues related to my father’s absence in my formative years. It was necessary to forgive my dad for not being present for me as a small child. (I didn’t even know I had resentment against him for that! There were no memories of his absence and I mentally understood why he had done what he did. In fact, I respected him for his sacrifice.)
In faith, however, I decided to express forgiveness. I received prayer ministry and counsel. As I did this, a new ability to trust God was re-established inside of me. The sense of panic lessened. I felt safe and secure in God’s arms.
What Is Basic Trust?
Our human ability to trust develops in the first 18 months of life.
Psychologist Erik Erickson developed a theory of psychosocial development. In it, he described how babies learn from their caregivers about whether or not the world is a safe place. In this process, they either develop basic trust or basic mistrust of people (and God).
“Small babies are new to this world and may view the outside world as threatening. Depending on how they are treated by people around them, the sense of threat can be replaced by trust. When this happens, they gain a sense of security and begin to learn to trust people around them.” https://www.psychologynoteshq.com/erikerikson/
So how does this relate to missionaries facing visa uncertainty?
No Parents Are Perfect
Even great parents are not perfect. And many people, including missionaries, didn’t have great parents. We might have had tired parents, or busy and stressed out parents.
Some have had abusive caregivers during their early childhood years.
Take time to notice what is going on inside of you when the threat of visa crisis looms large.
Do you begin to feel panicked? Insecure and unsafe?
Allow the Holy Spirit to take you to the root of those feelings. What might those feelings be exposing that God wants to heal?
God never promises us freedom from challenge and pain. He does promise to be near us in the midst of it. The Father longs to give you the security and peace you need. He wants you to live life fully and joyfully.
That is true even when there is visa uncertainty.
Help Is Available – Seek It Out
Many good counseling centers for missionaries exist around the world. More are being developed. Coaches and prayer ministers can talk you through these issues too.
If you feel insecurities beginning to surface, seek help and healing. It is available.
Partner with God’s processes in your life and embrace them. There is joy on the other side.