Living faithful, fruitful and fulfilled on the mission field
Intimacy with God must be the constant pursuit of any disciple of Jesus. This is even more true of those of us who want to see Kingdom impact through our lives and ministries. The following article is a guest contribution by Kima Hmar. A dependent …
When I was ordained as a pastor, I was given a book called “Choosing to Cheat.” That’s a strange title, I thought. The author wrote about the danger of cheating on our spouses by giving our best time and energy to the ministry we do. …
How did Jesus choose His disciples? They were an unlikely group. Fishermen, a tax collector, a random doctor thrown into the mix. What did He look for in those who would serve alongside Him? Throughout history, God has chosen unlikely people to do His work. What characteristics are most important in the life of a cross-cultural minister?
We are born with personality traits. They are a matter of DNA, handed down by our parents. Other traits develop in early childhood. You don’t choose whether you are an introvert or an extrovert.
Character, however, is developed. It grows both in adolescence and adulthood. We can choose to intentionally embrace God’s transforming work in our lives. He prunes and develops us. Through this, we grow into the person He wants us to be. This article looks at this issue particularly as it pertains to those who minister cross-culturally.
Many qualities of an effective missionary are developed in the field. As we go, labor, and struggle, these things grow in us. Some can be worked on before entering life as a cross-cultural minister.
This can not be over-emphasized. It is out of our life with God that everything flows. As we abide in Him, we bear much fruit. Apart from Him, we can do nothing (John 15:16).
Our understanding of His character creates the foundation through which we interpret life. This is true both for our own lives, and as we help others. We come to understand His character through the study of His Word. We also learn who He is as we experience His character manifested through circumstances.
I knew God as Healer, Provider, and Grace-giver as I experienced Him being those things for me on the field.
We grow in understanding of His love. We learn to find satisfaction in God Himself, not in fruit or results. (No matter how much pressure you feel to write those exciting letters to supporters back home!) His purposes and His glory become our driving motivation for our work. This happens as we grow in an ever-deeper relationship with Jesus.
Our world markets freedom from hardship as a virtue. Yet suffering is both a normal and important part of a disciple’s life. Jesus said, “In this world, you will have trouble. Don’t be dismayed. I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). Paul writes of wanting to know Christ and fellowship with Him in suffering (Phil. 3:10).
Unless we are willing to embrace a life of hardship, we can not become effective cross-cultural ministers. This begins with a deep surrender to the Lordship of Jesus. It also requires a firmly held belief in the goodness of God, no matter what we go through.
We learn to endure trials, difficulties, persecution, temptation, pain, and hardship as good soldiers. (2 Tim. 2:3-5). But soldiers who are deeply loved by a good, good Father who cares for us.
While we do not want to suffer, when it comes, we allow God to use it to form His character in us and draw us into His embrace.
Compassion, empathy, and a servant’s heart must become part of who we are. The source of these characteristics is our relationship with Jesus. As we spend time with Him, we catch His heart for the lost.
The Master wept over Jerusalem, His heart was broken over their resistance to His truth. Do the things that break God’s heart break yours? Are you able to see the people around you with His eyes of love and compassion?
Our ability to empathize with others is vital if we want to minister. As we identify with their context, needs, and situation we are able to communicate God’s truth in a way they will understand.
If we come as a Savior, we will fail. Only Christ can save. If we come with the heart of a servant, His salvation will flow through us.
One thing that sustains people in the field is knowing God has called them there. This may be a supernatural encounter you point to. It may simply be a deep knowing that comes from the study of His Word and the Great Commission. Either way, you need to know that God has directed you to the work you do. This foundational sense of calling from God will keep you in the times you desperately want to quit and go home.
When vision and passion are clear, you are also more able to focus and “keep the main thing the main thing.”
Many missionaries drift into activities not related to their original call. Sometimes, God is redirecting. Other times, we need to realign ourselves. We must go back to what God spoke in the beginning.
A cross-cultural minister must be willing to take risks and try new things. Be it food, or a new cultural dance, our lives require us to step outside of what is comfortable.
This is true when it comes to sharing the good news with those around us as well. Not everyone has an extroverted personality. Not everyone is born an optimist.
Faith and boldness, however, are qualities God develops within us. As we take steps outside our natural abilities, these characteristics begin to grow. They are the fruit of His Spirit’s work in us.
These can be developed before going to the mission field. You never stop growing in these though!
Choosing to be flexible means letting go of control. This is difficult. In a cross-cultural ministry context, it will make or break you.
It is so natural for us to want to go into a cross-cultural environment as a teacher rather than a learner. Jesus modeled a different approach. In the book of Philippians, we see He took on the form of a baby and servant, not a King. In any cross-cultural work, learn before you teach. Humility and a posture of learning make you far more effective.
Hospitality is an often overlooked qualification for spiritual eldership. It is mentioned in both 1 Timothy 3:2 and Titus 1:8.
As we engage with people of other worldviews, the need to exercise this gift is even more important.
In Western culture, hospitality is on the decline. Our busy lives prevent us from making time to invite someone into our home for a cup of coffee, or a meal. Those who learn to practice hospitality generously have deeper relationships of trust with those they want to reach.
There is strength when we work in teams. That doesn’t mean it’s easy! For those with high D (DISC test) personalities, working with others who also have strong leadership qualities can be difficult. Cross-cultural relationships present unique challenges. Yet those with a lone-ranger approach, rarely are sustained and effective on the field.
Though this is listed as number ten, it is critically important to our emotional and spiritual health as cross-cultural ministers. Peter Scazerro’s books on emotionally healthy spirituality give insight on this important topic. Our marriage and family must be a source of life, the place from which we minister. Healthy singleness becomes a source of nourishment for others.
Take a few moments to assess yourself in these ten qualities. Where do you need to grow? Where are you already strong? Talk to a friend or co-worker this week. Decide on two or three actions you want to take to grow in your weak areas.
What other qualities are important? Share in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group.
“Knowing God is about a relationship, not religion,” we tell people. This is true! We believe it. If we are honest, though, there are times when our relationship with God can feel pretty religious. We go through the motions without much connection. Dryness creeps in, …
How do you share the gospel effectively with Buddhists? We have been posting recently on how to communicate the gospel to people of other religions. This week’s post is written by Jay Judson. He has seen thousands of Buddhists come to Christ. Through his team, …
“Flex!” the team leader said loudly. My friend, Tim, led many short-term mission trips. Flex is his favorite word. When we received teams he was leading, we noticed this word used often. Learning how to be flexible, being willing to adapt, and able to adjust, are attitudes and skills that lead to fruitful cross-cultural work.
Adjusting to other ways of thinking and doing is not easy. Most anyone can make adjustments for a few weeks on a short-term trip. Adapting to another culture, in the long-term, takes great determination.
Are you willing to lay down your own ways, paradigms, and worldview to interact in meaningful ways with those you desire to reach? This will determine the depth of your missional impact. It is a lot more than being willing to eat strange food, though that is important. This has to do with developing cultural humility and a welcoming spirit. It demands we repent of pride, and let go of our desire to be in control. These are not easy, but they shape and mold us into Christ-likeness.
My trainee had been in Cambodia for six months. In his training, we had taught about adapting to culture and its importance. At first, it was fun and exciting to live in a new land. That soon wore off. Now, he missed home, especially his own food.
Being from the land of spices, many of the things that might bother a Westerner were not difficult for him. What was hard was the food. “Why would that be a struggle?” I wondered. Rice and flavorful sauces…they seemed similar to me! Not to him.
When I arrived, he was struggling deeply. As I probed, he blurted out his issue. “I can’t understand why they have to put sugar in their curry. That is not the right way to make curry!”
We have a tendency to think our own ways of cooking, eating, thinking, relating…basically of doing everything, are the right ways. Until you get beyond this, it’s very hard to adjust.
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.
Romans 12:3 NIV.
This is one of the easiest in many ways, though as in the example of my Indian friend, it can become challenging over time. Not only must you be willing to try new foods, you must take the next step and learn to cook them. Let their commonly eaten food become what you frequently eat as well. Food is a huge bridge into the hearts of the people you want to reach.
We each have our own distinctive styles of clothing we prefer. Adapting to another completely different way of dressing is difficult. For a man who has never worn a piece of cloth wrapped around their waste, it feels strange. Wearing national clothing, even when those around you have westernized, shows love for the culture of those you want to reach. It communicates…I like you and your people!
Even learning a few phrases of another language opens hearts. When you speak well and fluently, you are much more likely to be accepted as an insider. This takes great effort and time. I recommend learning language in a style that builds long-term relationships. Language learning can truly be ministry!
I admit. This can be a hard one for me. Getting things done quickly, and ticked off my list is my definite personality preference. Much flexibility has been required of me in this area.
It is easy to get angry when things don’t happen quickly and our goals are not met. Whether it is waiting in a long and crowded line, the inefficiency of the way things are being done (in your perspective), you will need to adjust. It goes the other way as well. Perhaps you are now working in a Western nation where speed and efficiency are highly valued by those around you.
Another factor to observe is what it means to be “on time.” For a person from Switzerland, or the Netherlands, on time means five minutes early. In some cultures, you can be several hours late and its still considered “on time.”
We must be willing to let go of our preferences and adopt the patterns of the people we are working among. In Thailand, where I’ve lived for a few years now, there is nothing more distasteful to them then a pushy, agitated person who is in a hurry. Your witness can be destroyed in a few moments due to your inability to be flexible as it relates to time.
If you come from a nation where democratic processes are in place, you will naturally prefer that style. Those from hierarchical cultures naturally are more comfortable when there is an older leader who takes charge. “Why do they keep asking me what I want to do? They are the leader!” the local team members might think.
Learning to adapt to the authority structure of the culture you work among will save a lot of stress. Recognize the differences, and let go of your judgments about them. They are not right or wrong, just different.
How decisions are made is a very cultural thing. In some cultures, the oldest person present makes the final decision. Other cultures are communal. Nothing is decided until there is complete consensus. Don’t assume that the way your culture makes decisions is the best way for the context you are in. Observe the way things get decided among your people and flow with it. You’ll accomplish much more this way then if you try to impose a culturally different process.
This is another key worldview issue. What you considered most valuable may not be what they think is important. Adjust and adapt. Value and esteem what they value, and not only will they like and trust you, but it will be fruitful as well.
Here’s an example. Some cultures have a high value for education. Telling Chinese or Korean parents that education shouldn’t matter to them is not going to be fruitful. Instead, why not show value to it by offering tuition to their children as a way to build relationships? Instead of resisting a cultural norm, you can flow with it and use it for the Kingdom.
While I wish I could tell you that after a few years you will be fine, I can’t. Willingness to be flexible, adapt and adjust in new cultures is life-long if we desire to be a missional person. It keeps us leaning on God and walking in humility, continually asking for His help.
What is your greatest struggle with cross-cultural adaptation?
Share in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group.
In missions (and life), I’m not big on formulas. I’ve found that often A+ B just doesn’t equal C. But in John 15, Jesus gives us a simple answer for how to become more fruitful. Spiritual Rituals Bring Life After returning from a long trip, …
My heart pounded as I approached the immigration line. What would they say? Would I be allowed to enter the country? Would my bags be searched? I’d shared my testimony with someone on the plane feeling prompted by the Holy Spirit. Had I been courageous …
Have you ever met a missionary who seemed angry with the people of the country they worked in? Their mouths are always spouting off negative comments about the traffic, the food, and the way of life of the people in their host country? It’s an ugly reality that many missionaries struggle to adapt and love their adopted nation and its people. I’ve been there. No judgments from me.
We can’t stay there though.
Maybe it’s not cultural and external things. At a deeper, more profound level, you feel disgusted with the sin around you.
Unless we develop God’s heart for those around us, we will never be able to reach them. Until we are able to show empathy, compassion and love, our message will fall flat.
I listened to my friend speak. The words came from the mouth of someone I respected – a veteran missionary. I’d learned many things from this person over the years.
As he spoke, I wanted to rush to his side and place my hand over his mouth. “Please don’t say those kinds of things about the people of this land!” My mind shouted. My actual voice stayed silent. I continued to listen.
I could hear the disgust and judgment in his voice. He spoke of the evil practices around him; the sexual immorality, the gender confusion, the ungodly behavior. What he said was not false. But it was said with harshness. Anger was boiling over and spilling out.
“Oh Lord! His judgment creates a bigger barrier to the gospel than anything language or culture ever could,” I thought. It threatened to damaged my opinion of this minister. His words were like an ugly garment wrapped around his being.
Then, I had to look inward. Did I judge and blame those I was trying to reach as well? Was my heart reflecting God’s heart for them? Could I see them from His perspective, as His beloved creation? Made in His image and in need of His love and restoration?
Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.
1 Pet. 4:8
As ministers of the gospel, we desperately need to receive God’s heart for those around us. Apart from His love flowing through us, we will have minimal impact on the lost.
Gaining a Christ-like perspective on others isn’t as easy as it sounds. We must intentionally pursue empathy, compassion, and seek to identify with the needs of others. As we do this, we begin to develop a heart for them.
One definition of empathy is “the ability to sense other people’s emotions, coupled with the ability to imagine what someone else might be thinking or feeling.”
Often when we hear others express their views or struggles, we focus on offering solutions. We want to help by telling them how to solve their problems.
This the opposite of what they need! Instead, we must try to understand what they are feeling and show that understanding. Being heard and understood is a great human need.
To do this, we step outside of ourselves and listen well. We listen not only to the words, but to the emotions beneath the words. We reflect back to them what we are hearing, showing we have listened well.
You might ask someone “How does that make you feel?” as opposed to “What do you think about that?”
Some of us are natural “feelers.” We pick up emotional cues easily. Others are more intellectual. They are thinkers. For those of us in that category, we must be intentional about developing empathy in our lives.
When listening with empathy, we then take the next step. We identify with their pain.
I need to make clear what this is and isn’t though. It is not saying something like, “Yeah, I’ve faced those things and even worse! You will get over this soon as I did.” That is not helpful at all. That kind of identification belittles their very real situation and issue. It is a put-down rather than a hand extended to pull them up.
Instead, we might vulnerably say something like, “I am sorry you are going through that. A few years ago, I went through something similar and it was deeply painful. I hurt for you.”
Do you see the difference? Make yourself vulnerable and came alongside as a fellow sufferer. This is especially important in helping people who are suffering due to sin or failure. When we show them that we too have failed, and we too are sinners with areas of brokenness in our lives, it gives hope.
Though you may not have been through the exact thing they are facing, you can still learn to identify with their pain and difficulty. But remember, not from above, but by coming alongside.
Compassion means “to suffer together.” Berkely.edu says that the difference between compassion and empathy is that compassion includes the desire to do something to relieve the pain of the sufferer. It is empathy plus action.
Matthew 9:36 says that Jesus was “moved with compassion” when he saw the crowds. They were like sheep without a shepherd. He then was moved to do something in response to the lostness He saw.
Compassion is different from pity. Pity “feels sorry” for the person. It says, “I’m so glad I’m not in that person’s position.” It places you above the sufferer, not alongside them.
People do not need pity. They need compassion. They need us to be willing to suffer with them. To be willing to take sacrificial action to relieve their pain, as we walk alongside.
If our own ability to receive God’s love is under-developed, we will serve others out of selfish motivations. We want to see ourselves as good people. Heroic dreams fill our minds and hearts. All kinds of wrong motivations sneak into our lives!
It is only as we ourselves receive God’s unconditional love and acceptance that can recognize how He sees others around us. Only as we continually receive from Him, can we give to others the gifts described above. It is God in us expressing empathy, demonstrating compassion, and serving the lost and desperate ones we come in contact with.
We must work on our own heart toward others. A the same time we continue to allow God’s healing to restore our own brokenness. In fact, it is out of that brokenness and pain we minister to those around us. We identify with what they are experiencing because of our own journeys toward wholeness.
How can you show empathy and compassion to those around you today? Let me know in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group.
Reverse culture shock…it’s real. I’d returned to the United States after many years in India. Why do we need to make appointments two weeks in advance to see our friends? When I stop by, why am I not invited in for tea? I felt confused. …