Living faithful, fruitful and fulfilled on the mission field
How do you share the gospel effectively with Buddhists? We have been posting recently on how to communicate the gospel to people of other religions. This week’s post is written by Jay Judson. He has seen thousands of Buddhists come to Christ. Through his team, …
“Flex!” the team leader said loudly. My friend, Tim, led many short-term mission trips. Flex is his favorite word. When we received teams he was leading, we noticed this word used often. Learning how to be flexible, being willing to adapt, and able to adjust, …
In missions (and life), I’m not big on formulas. I’ve found that often A+ B just doesn’t equal C. But in John 15, Jesus gives us a simple answer for how to become more fruitful.
After returning from a long trip, it is so good to get back to my normal routines. One of my favorite daily rituals is having my quiet time. I wake up, grab some coffee and go to my secret place. I plop down in my favorite spot, a comfortable couch that overlooks my garden.
Every morning, that is where I meet with God. I listen to His voice and process my life with Him. Worship, reading scripture, prayer, and then simply sitting in His Presence receiving from Him are a daily habit.
Do you have a secret place? A “spot” where you regularly meet with God?
Establishing spiritual rhythms and rituals need not be something legalistic. They can be life-giving. A spiritual habit of abiding in Jesus is crucial to living fruitful on the mission field.
Remaining in Him goes beyond just having a regular quiet time though. As John 15 tells us, abiding in Jesus also means learning to love and obey. These must also become spiritual habits in our lives.
Being on the move takes a lot out of me, especially in certain contexts. I recently visited a city where travel is challenging. Traffic jams, noise, pollution, and the dirt all around make it more difficult to feel connected to God’s Spirit.
The spiritual environment is difficult there too. Temples blare out chants and music that rubs against my spirit. Pushy and aggressive people around me shout and shove each other (and me), as I try to get off the vehicle I’ve boarded.
I feel myself getting angry inside. Instead of love, I start to feel something else. It is disdain. And maybe even a tiny bit of (let’s be honest and call it what it is) hate.
How natural it is in those situations for me to give in to the feelings rising inside!
It is so much easier to push back, roll my eyes and give people dirty looks than to pray for them. I often don’t “feel” loving toward those who are so rude and demanding around me.
Yet this is where my faith is tested. It is in situations like these where I find out how well I am doing at abiding in Jesus. I can choose to obey His command to love others or give in to my fleshly desire to feel justified in my frustration.
It is in those times that the reserves I have built up from regularly going to my secret place pay off. If my “love tank” is filled up because I’ve received from Jesus’ love, I easily overcome. I am kind and gracious. But when I’m empty inside, it isn’t so easy.
“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command.” John 15:12-14 NIV.
John 15 is such a key passage of scripture when we talk about fruitfulness in our Christian lives! In this passage, the word fruit is repeated many times. Equally prominent are the words love and remain (or abide). There is another keyword there too. It is the word obey (or command). How do these things tie together?
The first part of the chapter focuses on remaining in Christ. It describes the connection of this with fruitfulness.
– “Remain in me, as I also remain in you.”
– “Neither can you bear fruit, unless you remain in me.”
– “If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit.”
– “If you remain in me, and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, it will be done for you.”
It is easy to see that remaining in Him is crucial for fruitfulness! I’m sure that isn’t a new idea for you. What does it really mean to remain in Him? To stay connected to His presence?
The next section of the chapter gives us the answer to that question we so often puzzle over.
We must love and obey. When we love and obey Jesus, we are remaining in Him. The evidence of our connection to Christ is our love for others and our obedience to Jesus’ commands.
– “Remain in my love.”
– “If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love.”
– “Love each other, as I have loved you.”
– “You are my friends if you do what I command.”
– “This is my command: Love each other.”
The evidence that we are abiding in Him, remaining connected to Jesus is our love for others.
The Father loved Jesus. He loved us. Now we love others. That is the flow of the vine that will bear fruit.
So how are you doing at loving others? Do you struggle to love your team members well? Do you have a hard time letting go of an offense?
What about lost people? How are you doing at loving the unreached who live around you? Do they annoy and anger you? Or is your heart filled with love and compassion for them?
The answer is probably mixed. I know mine is! Some days I am overwhelmed with love for both the lost and for my brothers and sisters in Christ. Like Peter, I am ready to make bold declarations of my willingness to die for them! Other days, well, not so much.
On some days, I am even downright rude in my reactions to those who rub me wrong. The person in the vegetable stall who decides to change the rules about how he weighs the vegetables. The person who shoves me as I get off the bus or airplane. Or the co-worker who gets so distracted that they can’t complete their work. Even after many reminders!
Like you, I want my life to be fruitful in the Kingdom. I love the promises in this passage! “Ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you!” That inspires my faith. But there are conditions attached to the promise. Things I must fulfill in order to ask for great things from God.
So here is the formula I find in John 15.
First, I must stay in His love. I need to receive it. (Both my daily dose during quiet time and the continual flow as I stay connected to Jesus throughout the day.) Then I must release it to my friends, neighbors, co-workers and most of all to my own family members.
As I, by His grace, obey the command to love others well, my life will bear fruit. His promise is true. There will be much, much fruit in my missionary endeavors, and that fruit will last.
Let me encourage you, go to that secret place once again. Get alone with the Master and receive His love afresh. Then get busy obeying His command to actively love those around you. Fruit is on the way!
What is the best way you have found to “abide in Jesus”? Let me know in the comments or on the Missionary Life Facebook Group.
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Reverse culture shock…it’s real. I’d returned to the United States after many years in India. Why do we need to make appointments two weeks in advance to see our friends? When I stop by, why am I not invited in for tea? I felt confused. Hospitality in Western culture is not a high value. It is a biblical one. This practice must be developed in the lives of those who wish to minister cross-culturally.
I wrote about hospitality in 10 Qualities of a Cross-Cultural Minister. Let’s go a bit deeper.
For some, hospitality comes naturally. For others, you will need to make an intentional effort. What hospitality looks like is varied, depending on your culture. It is also impacted by age.
Effectiveness as a missionary will be dramatically affected by your willingness (or lack of such) to develop the biblical practice of hospitality. This is true no matter what culture or generation you come from.
I have to admit, hospitality is not my gift. My husband’s personality is much more hospitable. It is something I have worked to develop.
In India, where we lived for many years, their worldview says “guests should be treated the same as god.” It comes from the Sanskrit phrase “atithi devo bhava.” Guests are frequently welcomed into homes and offered a cup of tea or some kind of food.
It doesn’t matter how busy you are, or what you are in the middle of doing. If someone comes to your door or you meet them by chance, you stop what you are doing and offer hospitality.
Middle-eastern cultures are like this as well.
Talking with a stranger on an airplane on my way to Kabul some years ago, I was invited for a meal. I’d never met this person before. We’d only had a few minutes of conversation, exchanging stories about our children.
As a guest in her country, she offered hospitality to me. That meal, would not be a mere cup of tea. It would be a feast.
Though not a Jesus follower, in many ways, this woman was more biblical in her practice of hospitality than I was.
It took time to develop this new habit in my life. There are times I still work at it. It did become normal for me to offer at least some kind of beverage and snack to anyone at any time. When we returned to our Western culture, I missed this.
An overseer must not give people a reason to criticize him, and he must have only one wife. He must be self-controlled, wise, respected by others, ready to welcome guests, and able to teach.
1 Tim 3:2 New Century Version
It is easy to get busy. In our search for productivity and value, we take on more than we should. We get sucked into projects that aren’t God’s assignments for us. Meetings are planned we feel obligated to be part of. Busyness is the enemy of hospitality.
Often, our identity is connected to our ability to produce work. Even our fruitfulness in the Kingdom can become a search for identity and a sense of value.
Jesus was different from this. He was never too busy trying to produce fruit or building the Kingdom to stop and chat with a child or a widow. His ease and relaxed manner made Him more effective and more fruitful. People always mattered more to Him than a goal or agenda.
Sometimes we are lazy to provide hospitality. It’s hard work. Welcoming people and offering them a place at our table means we are willing to make an effort. We can be hesitant to do this. Other things matter more to us. “We don’t even have any relationship with these strangers. Why make time for them?” we ask.
We don’t want to open our homes (or our lives) because people will see who we are. Our false self, the image we project on Facebook or Instagram is different than our real lives. If people enter our homes spontaneously, they may see that our floor is dirty or our bathroom not clean.
Welcoming people into our homes does make us vulnerable. We don’t know these people. Will they judge us? Steal from us? Gossip about us? We must put these fears aside and be willing to be known by others…even by strangers. Let God protect your image.
Fear is even stronger now, with the COVID 19 pandemic. Not only about image, or theft, but fear of sickness. How can you be hospitable while still being wise during this season?
It costs money and time to offer hospitality. We are tired from our normal work. Now, we must go the extra mile to plan a meal or organize a party.
When we are stretched financially, we struggle to give. Realizing we can’t afford to give the best (buying chicken and the nicest rice for example), we don’t want to give at all. “Give and it will be given unto you,” the Bible says (Luke 6:38). We can’t out give God. Don’t let your own lack prevent you from offering hospitality to others.
I’m grateful to serve in a mission that values hospitality. Our core values state it this way, “we affirm the ministry of hospitality as an expression of God’s character and the value of people. We believe it is important to open our hearts, homes, and campuses to serve and honor one another, our guests, and the poor and needy, not as acts of social protocol, but as expressions of generosity.” (Value 17)
You may serve with another mission, or be someone who wants to reach out to immigrants or people of other cultures. This biblical value and practice will help you relate well to people of other cultures and build bridges into their hearts.
In spite of the pandemic, find one way you can be hospitable to a stranger this week. Offer a pre-packaged packet of biscuits they can open themselves. Invite them for a meal. Open your front porch if your dining room table is off-limits because of the virus. Welcome guests and strangers. I’d love to hear what you did, or questions you have in the comments below or in the Missionary Life Facebook group.
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It’s a bit of a cliché, but it’s true. Wounded people wound others. When someone lashes out at you in an extreme way, it is likely more their issue than yours. We need the wisdom to know how to love emotionally unhealthy people. I wish I could say that everyone on the mission field is healthy and will always behave in a mature and godly manner. It’s just not true.
The reality is, most of us struggle at times with unhealthy responses and over-reactions. We get triggered by things that are said or done. Something deep inside of us responds…the wounded child, not the mature adult. This happens to our teammates too.
At times you will have to interact with people who are severely broken inside. They may be suffering from a mental illness like depression, borderline personality, or narcissism.
Diagnosed or not, we work with them. They are part of our missionary families and teams. We find ourselves in situations where we are not in a place to require them to get help. How do we interact in love, but stay healthy ourselves?
God wants us to develop a compassionate view toward those who are suffering. We must recognize their outbursts and over-reactions as a cry for help. These are symptoms of deeper problems. We must learn not to take them personally. This isn’t easy. It’s not easy at all.
For many years I was ignorant about what it was like to suffer in an area of mental health. When I unexpectedly began to struggle with severe depression and saw a counselor, a new world opened to me. I began to learn. With treatment and medication, I was able to recover. As I have shared my story with others, I’ve realized I was not alone. Many people suffer from depression.
Since then, I have talked with missionaries who shared their mental health struggles. Some shared they were bi-polar. Others have been treated for numerous other mental health issues. These are good people. They are great missionaries whom I deeply respect. Mental illness is not their fault. It is deserving of compassion, not scorn or judgment.
Undiagnosed and untreated mental health problems cause huge marriage and team issues in the field. The stigma of mental illness is still very significant. (Stigma is “a mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person”).
Many are terrified to admit they are struggling and seek help. They need our compassion and sensitivity, not anger or disdain. It is a very tough road to walk as we navigate around their unhealthy reactions. It is even harder for them to cope with their deep inner pain.
Compassion is defined as- the sympathetic concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as in Christ, God forgave you.”
Eph. 4:32
Will you choose compassion over judgment when interacting with an unhealthy person?
Below are five things to consider, as you seek, with God’s help, to love the unhealthy people in your life. Determine to love them well.
Unhealthy people will want you to immediately respond. Their problems and the constant crisis created around them can suck the very life out of you. Don’t allow that. It’s okay to say “I’m not able to listen to you when you talk that way to me. Let’s talk later.” You can politely walk away. Don’t let them control or manipulate you into immediately dropping what matters to you, and doing things their way. This doesn’t actually help them.
When you set healthy boundaries, they will behave better as they interact with you. The book Boundaries, by Cloud and Townsend, can help you further. It gives great guidelines related to this.
Continue to love your friends, colleagues, or family members who struggle with brokenness in their lives. They will try to control you or push you away. Don’t let them. Choose to love emotionally unhealthy people unconditionally. That doesn’t mean you have to like the way they behave. Love is a decision you make. Commit to love them no matter what they do. Choose not to take offense, or hold on to unforgiveness related to their interactions with you.
One of the most helpful things you can do for those in your life who are unhealthy is to stay healthy yourself. That means taking sabbaths, resting well, and doing things to refresh yourself in God. Prioritize your own emotional health and well-being. By doing this, you will have the stamina and space needed to love them when they respond out of brokenness.
I have to tell myself this. It seems counter-intuitive. We are conditioned to give more than what we have…to give sacrificially to others. This is a good thing for many. It is not a good thing when relating to an unhealthy person. When you give to them sacrificially, they will often demand even more.
Ask yourself, “Do I have the ability to give to this person right now?” They may want you to listen to them complain, or tell a long story of how violated they feel. Or they may say manipulative things like, “No one here loves me. I wish someone would spend time with me.” Look inward. If you have extra energy and time, give it. Don’t tap into your reserves to give beyond what you are able. It will not help them in the end, and it will harm your ability to love the other healthy people in your life well.
Stability is deeply reassuring to those who are working through brokenness. Knowing that you will always respond with gentle, firm, compassionate boundaries, communicates safety. They can trust and count on you. Others might give up on them, but you will be there, not without boundaries, but with love.
If you believe a friend, family member or colleague is struggling with a mental health issue, prayerfully encourage them to get help.
Let them know you don’t think badly of them for their struggle. Have a crucial conversation and encourage them to think about the long-term effects on their life, family, and ministry. They may not listen to you, but someday later, they may feel less condemned if they seek counsel.
Having a small inner circle of friends walk with you through mental illness is vital. Are you compassionate enough to be one of those people? Do you need that in your own life?
If you have noticed extreme reactions in yourself or others, consider talking to a counselor about it. Help and healing are available. It’s not too late.
Are there other things you’ve found to be helpful when interacting with unhealthy teammates on the mission field? I’d be interested to hear about those in the comments below or on the Missionary Life Facebook group.
As we go to new nations and begin ministry there, the idea of fruitfulness is on our minds. We imagine the impact we can have and the lives that will be changed because of us being there. This is a noble thing. We should desire …